Debating the merits of politcally themed art

I've not been feeling so great lately (some bizarre sinus infection/cold/cootie that resulted in needing a CAT scan earlier this week - and thanks to all my friends who offered up their cats for the purpose of the test but I think that wasn't the point, there were no furry animals involved) so I've not been real motivated to work on any art. Which - and this makes me very happy - is starting to frustrate me. This makes me glad because it means that I'm finally waking up out of this stupor I've been in for a few months.

So yesterday I pulled out my sketch books and started looking at past ideas for art quilts. And I noticed a trend...

There are a lot of social/political cause sketches in there. I've got two series that have a fairly developed line of ideas.

The first series will be about - and I guess I should just come clean and be honest - things that pretty much irritate the hell out of me. Topics range from the drug industry's new role as seedy pushers to spending my days in gray cubicles doing work that I'm not sure amounts to anything to being plugged into electronics 24/7.

The second series came about after participating in the Yoni challenge on the QuiltArt email list. Its not a topic I am usually quick to create art about. Not because I'm the squeamish type but I have mixed feelings about people making art about their genitals. On the one side, I think its admirable that they are so comfortable and uninhibited...on the other hand, I'm just not sure I really want to see it. (Kind of like when a kid lays on the floor to look up someone's skirt...it just doesn't seem like something you should do.)

But the Yoni challenge on the Quiltart list intrigued me because I had just watched a show on the National Geographic channel about female circumcision. It grossed me out, it enraged me, it make me cringe. So when I heard about the challenge, I decided to make a piece about that. Its pretty graphic, titled "Land of the Sewn Women" - and is currently hiding in my pile of completed works.

After making that quilt, I started doing research about other cultural practices that result in accepted violence against women. I found a lot and started doing sketches for a series. And its important to note that women submit to this because if they don't, they won't find a husband and will become an old maid. Yeeeeeaaaaahhhhh...I think I'd be good with being a spinster.

So I guess it would seem that I am heading toward doing more political/social issues in my work. And this realization forces me to pause for several reasons...

The first being that its exhausting. As much as there is a part of me that digs into this stuff and reads article after article on it, it takes a lot out of me. Its difficult subject matter...so why am I drawn to it?

The second being this: what purpose will it serve? Its obvious from how I've treated "Land of the Sewn Women" that I'm hesitant to put it out there. I've always been of the opinon that politcal art is necessary but I've never felt the need to slap people upside the head with it. This, dear readers, creates something of an oxymoron. If I make this work, will I show it?

The last worry revolves around reactions to it. I believe I'm a good person, I try to lead a good life...but there is nothing that will divide people quicker then the subject of politics, religion and sex. Do I risk negative reactions from fellow artists and friends?

These are all difficult questions and they are kicking around in my head. What is it in me that feels the need to take a medium developed to instill comfort and security and trap painful subject matter in it? Do I pursue it? Do I leave it be? Do I make it to satisfy my own need to create it and then hide it away? If I do that, what's the point? Do I continue to skirt the edges of it in order to maintain a certain standing among other artists? Am I just worrying too much? Is it possible to make "friendly" political art?

See? Told you it was exhausting...

Dun-dun...dun-dun...dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun...

Duh-nuuuuhhhhhh!!!!

That's supposed to be the Jaws music, in case you were wondering. And its dedicated to Ethel.

She's been quite stealthy today but a heavy work load has kept her at bay. I've had several meetings at my desk and the large number of managers and vendors seems to scare her off. But I've seen her circling, looking for an opportunity.

Which is good because I still haven't prepared for my defense against my little shark. Oh, don't worry, I'm not giving in to her ploys but I have the urge to be, shall we say, creative with the solution.

A friend said to me, "Why don't you just tell her absolutely not, under any circumstances, will you make something for her?" I have. That's the whole point: she doesn't listen to things she doesn't want to hear. So I've got to improve my arsenal.

Ethel is the definition of conservative. Not that there is anything wrong with that but she seems fairly easy to freak out. My current plan is to print out "inappropriate" (that's Ethel's favorite word of all time) material and put it in the magazine she left me. (This would include pictures of the paper doll Leann and Jane and their mother made for me of the Venus of Willendorf.) This shouldn't be too difficult to accomplish since she ranks the following things in her top five of "inappropriate:"

5) Most everything on television. (She feels its all crude, violent, sexual, disrespectful or just plain dumb. Go on Ethel, tell us how you really feel...)

4) Nude art. (Hence the comments about the Venus of Willendorf needing a dress. I saw a picture in a magazine once of a piece of framed artwork in which a woman crocheted her vagina and knitted her husband's penis. (Oh, and it was for sale if you felt inclined to hang it on your living room wall.) While it made me shudder and turn the page so quick I pretty much tore it, this might be the type of thing that could help me win the war...)

3) Drinking alcohol for any reason. (I say the woman needs a drink, might help her out tremendously. Someone, quick! Bring this woman a margarita!!!)

2) Brittney Spears (While I can't argue Britt's defense, its interesting to note that Ethel complains about her incessantly. Never mind the fact that she's obviously watching/reading a gossip show/book in order to glean all the information she knows about her. That's totally not the point.)

And now I should warn you, #1 is kind of shocker. I learned this one recently when a fellow co-worker came over to talk to me all bleary-eyed and twitchy after being accosted by Ethel. But you have to hear this one, its a clear insight into her mind and way of thinking. Ready? Here goes...

1) S A N T A. (She thinks its wrong to tell children happy stories about a nice man giving presents to everyone and spreaking cheer. Its not "based in reality" and is "not the point" of the Christmas season. She also enjoys pointing out that Santa is spelled with the same letters as satan. While this revelation makes me chuckle, its proof positive in her mind that the man is evil. Her rant about poor old St. Nick makes me think of the movie, The Christmas Story. She'd be the one kicking the kids in the forehead to make them go down the slide.)

Why do I know all this? Remember that dear Ethel has a broken volume switch and no filter. I know more about this woman then I would ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever voluntarily seek out. People see her coming and their eyes grow wide and they start to frantically dart about looking for a place to hide. There's no telling what kind of wisdom she will impart on you when she comes to visit.

See what I'm dealing with here? But I believe I am more crafty then her. (Oh wait, that was a bad pun...)

Just look at what I did to Tim Gunn...

What's in Tim Gunn's closet?

I'm sorry, I had to do it. Its the next best thing to a paper doll. The beauty of it is that I've saved it and can change his outfits and environment from time to time. He may become a regular feature on the blog now...

This is what Tim Gunn looks like when the cameras aren't rolling. He gets bored with that dull suit all the time and likes to cut loose in bars.


Forgive me, Tim....

Where I Stand Sunday

A short blip in the power supply threw into sharp relief how much of my life is dependent on electronics. Even something as simple as finding enough light to read a book by created a challenge. My connection to the outside world - through the internet, through the television, through the phone - was severed. I sat in the darkness and wondered for the first time what my life would be if I was not able to plug in so easily.

Where I Stand Sunday is an ongoing photo essay examining the different places I spend my life standing. Too often we take for granted the everyday places we spend our lives walking on. If you'd like to join me by posting a photo on Sunday of places you've been on your blog/photo hosting site/website, leave a comment on this post telling me where I can find you/your photo and I'll add a link to my sidebar so others can find you.

Invite them and they will come...

They came, they ate, they made merry...I LOVE my friends. We had our second annual Holiday party at my house and it was attended by members of Running With Scissors, The ATC Exchange and Looking Glass Dolls.

I think in the end we packed about 25 people into the house. It was mayhem, there was tons of food, there were gifts everywhere and it was awesome. (This post is REALLY long. I tried to shorten it, couldn't do it, so suck it up and just read it.)

The tone for the evening was set perfectly when Leann, Jane and Julia arrived. You see, Leann helps to keep me strange (and that was a compliment in case you were wondering.) Based on previous posts discussing Ethel's comments about the Venus of Willenddorf, they gave me this:

This is the Venus of Willendorf, female icon for over a hundred years, revered by thousands...turned into a paper doll and dressed up in a nightie, bikini with tassels, a crown complete with eyeballs and a party dress. (These lovely ensambles were not brought to you by Tim Gunn. They are compliments of Leann, Jane and their mother. You'd think their mother would help reel them in and be the voice of reason but the poor woman has obviously given up and now lives by the rule of "If you can't beat 'em, join 'em.")

This paper doll is sitting on my coffee table right now and I keep changing her clothes. She makes me giggle snort. Thanks guys.

I was a bit busy running around like a lunatic during the party so I unfortunately didn't get as many picture of people as I would like. (I saw Leann and Katy taking pictures. Check out their sites to see if they post any.) But here's what I did get:

Leann was sober enough this year to assign numbers to the gifts for the gift exchange. Although its important to note that it only took a glass of wine last year to make her cloudy.

Although the angel behind her does look concerned, doesn't she?

More poor unsuspecting guests having their photos taken. Notice the buffet of Jill's buttons on the coffee table. Everyone loved them.

This is what I got from the gift exchange, its from Sidney:

I LOVE lumiere paints so I'm really thrilled with this! Plus there is a box I can torture and fibers and see those tiny little bells? Sid says she was going to show up to the party "with bells on". She lied...but she did put them in the present so I suppose it was only a half lie.

Running with Scissors has also been doing a mini art quilt round robin the past few months and last night the group that I am in did the final exchange. The theme of my block was 'text' and here is what Sidney, Leann and Jackie did on it:



This totally kicks butt!! Its really inspiring and I've been contemplating a series featuring each letter of the alphabet. I've kind of held off on it because, well, it sounds a bit trite but seeing how this block came out has me reconsidering. The small format of the 12x12 contains it but packs a big punch too. The wheels are spinning...

When I got up this morning and was tidying up, I came across several things that I now feel bad about not giving the proper attention to last night. My apologies, gang, I was distracted. So I figured I would show them off here and do some gushing since I love them all so much...

Anne brought these goodies for mom and I. Yum! Thanks Anne!

I got these buttons from Jill. The "ignore me" one is going to work with me and the other two feed my addicitons. You totally need to check out her etsy store, Barrel of Monkeys. She is a button making machine and she does custom orders too. You can't beat them! Go - check them out, buy many, give them as gifts, get your flair on.

When we first started talking about this year's holiday party, someone suggested an alternate place other then my house. Which I'm cool with but the first comment was "But Dooley won't be there!" Ah yes, my little couch ornament is much beloved. So much in fact that Norma was a real sweetie and stopped off at the Three Dog Bakery to get him these! So even though no one got drunk enough for him to get to lick peanut butter off them, he got these and gives his thanks to his Auntie Norma.

Leann brought me this. I love henna tattoos. I'm not entirely sure what its made out of, but it will be incorporated into something weird. Thanks Leann. :)

I found this on one of my tables in my studio this morning and remembered that Emily brought this. So I ripped it open and started giggling. The Looking Glass Dolls that she and I are in is doing a doll challenge based on the theme 'games.' Emily is feeding my assemblage obsession with all types of goodies and I will be putting this to good use! Thanks Emily!!!

Anne brought a bunch of give-aways from a friend of her's that is moving and cleaning out her studio. There were lots of neat laces and Christmas fabrics but what I was really eyeballing was the neat bag it came in. I may have shamelessly blurted out that I thought it was cool and I wanted it. I found that as well in my studio this morning. Thanks Anne!

While in my studio this morning, I sat down at my work table to see what people had written. During the studio makeover, I decided rather then stressing about keeping my work table neat and clean, I would just make it an art project and let people draw and write on it. I can identify where most of the quotes came from but am a bit stumped as to who wrote some of the others. Anyone care to fess up?

I suspect that the little drawing of the guy is from Victor, Jackie's husband. I could be wrong but its my best guess. Oh, and I have to give kudos to Victor. He was the only guy, he was a huge help lugging around things that were too heavy for me and he is hereafter known as The Coffee God. (He makes a killer cup of coffee and did it voluntarily.) He was brave to spend an evening amongst twenty five jabbering women drinking and getting hopped up on sugar. Way to go Victor.

I also have lots of food left in my fridge (not the least of which is the outstanding mostacholi Heidi brought) even though I badgered people into taking their leftovers home. I swear, there was enough food here to feed an army -- and it was all soooooooooooooo tasty. (And Joan? I REALLY want the recipie for that veggie pizza. It will go well for my family's celebration of Vagilia on Christmas Eve.)

I thank everyone for coming and brining such wonderful food and for being such outstanding fun people! You REALLY make life fun and love all of you for it! :)

Oh, and Dooley loves all of you too. He thanks you for coming, he enjoyed being gushed over by so many people. In fact, he had such a good time that this is what he looks like today:


Way to go, guys, you totally wore out my dog. (He's snoring right now - L O U D L Y.)

Today I'm taking it easy. My back is twitchy from doing a bit more then I should have yesterday. One of the things I did was pushing snow around on the driveway. (And yes, Leann, I know you have seven properties to shovel. You have my sympathies. But I don't usually do it - because my back gets cranky like it is now - so I'm going to whine about it anyway.) During the snow pushing escapade yesterday, I turned around and saw this in a bush near the driveway:



What the HELL is that?!?!?! Hornet's nest? Bee hive? Its creepy. So of course I had to take a picture of it. I'm going to try to get some more shots of it because even though it makes my skin crawl, its pretty impressive that some little bugs can build this.

I'm going to ask my brother to shoot some poison in it and kill them all dead.

Happy holidays everyone.

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

When I walked into work today, I was greeted with one of the cruelest things I've heard in a long time: "I wouldn't drink that coffee you're holding, there was a water main break and the bathrooms are closed."

Huh? Say again? No coffee???

Never mind the fact that without water in the building, there could be a fire and we could all be incinerated alive. I need caffeine!!!

I went to my desk, put the cup down and just stared at it. Would I dare not drink my morning coffee? I would most certainly end up with a splitting headache (shoosh, I know its an addiction and I don't care) and would most likely not resemble a human being. I would have to wait four hours until lunchtime to be able to go the bathroom. I decided to risk it in the interest of public safety - not only so I wouldn't accidentally rip someone's head off for a minor offense but because, you know, I design parts of the car that are sort of important. I would just have to do the pee-pee dance, aren't you touched by the sacrifices I make for you?

Turns out I didn't have to wait until lunch (and no, I didn't wet myself.) They sent us home early, something about workplace safety and someone freaking out over the idea of them bringing in port-o-potties. To whoever it was that bitched about it, I thank you.

So that was the Good part - getting out of work early.

Did I go and do something fun? Of course not, I'm a responsible adult and those days are long gone. I actually had an appointment at the eye doctor for this afternoon so I moved it up a few hours once work set me free. I've been having some pressure in my left eye and saw a couple tiny flashes of light the other day so by this morning, I had pretty much diagnosed myself with retina detachment. Never mind the fact that I didn't have any trouble seeing, I was convinced, I needed to seek help. (You didn't know I had a medical degree, did you? I don't, I have the internet and it is all-wise and knowing. And not always a good thing. In my defense, I do have small patch of degeneration in my left eye and the eye doctor told me that if I ever saw light flashes or floaters to come see him right away. See? I was just doing as I was told...)

I went to see the doc, he checked me out and all is well. My eyes are not peeling apart like an onion, like I may have dramatically suggested to Mary when I spoke to her the other day. But the pressure is still there so now I need to go see my regular doctor to have her check out my sinuses.

That was the Bad part. (But in a way its a Good/Bad combo since my eyes still appear to be attached to my brain and functioning.)

So what's the Ugly part? Well....me. The doc had to dilate my eyes again. I hate that with a passion but I was cool with it. Bring on the evil drops, dude. Work your light blinding magic, do your voodoo dance - just tell me my eyes aren't falling apart!!! (Can you tell I've kind of been stressing about this the past couple of days?)

I am back to looking like The Amphibian Frog Lady from some low budget sci-fi film. I tried taking a picture so I could gross you out with it but forgot to turn off the flash so all I really did was hurt myself. Besides, you wouldn't want to see it anyway. But here's a description: my eyes are a light green with a dark green ring around the edge. The dark green ring is not real thick, its like my DNA decided to toss in some accent pillows when it was figuring out my eyes - its just a little decorative touch.

Right now you can see none of the light green and barely any of the dark green. Its all a big-black-vampire-looking-soul-sucking-void where my pupils are. The dog actually looked at me funny and walked to the other side of the room when I got home.

So tomorrow I'm going to go see my regular doctor and try to get this sorted out. But tonight I'm thinking of torturing myself by watching Pirates of the Carribean 3. Captain Jack can make everything better....

In which I explore an unimportant topic...

I'm sure I'm not going to sound completely rational with this post but bear with me. Its not a wildly controversial topic, its nothing earth shattering, it probably doesn't even rank a 5 on the interesting scale.

But its bugging the hell out of me and there have to be others who see it at as well...

I, like many, am addicted to Project Runway on Bravo. I didn't see the first season but have watched every season since then. I am by no means a fashion plate (STOP that laughing) but I'm enthralled by the concept of having to come up with a design concept in 30 minutes, shop for all your materials in 45 and then have about a day and a half to make said object.

What impresses me most is the restraint of the designers. I think every time Heidi or Tim walked into the design room to throw a wrench into the challenge, I'd be hurling mannequins at them. Its a good thing the sewing machines are attached to the tables, those could be good weapons as well.

So I sit there week after week and feel for the contestants. I yell at the screen that so-and-so is a weenie (although I have to say my favorite designer so far this season is the hippie girl, she's so entertaining) or the rules that they just changed aren't fair. I think its the femal equivalent to what men do when they are watching a football game.

I even watch the re-runs. I know how they end and I don't care. I'll watch it anyway. Give me a marathon and I'm in hog heaven. Come on, don't go judging me now. This is fascinating stuff. As a designer by day and an artist by evening, my stomach turns into knots just trying to figure out what in the hell I would do. (And be glad I get more then 30 minutes to design your transmissions. That type of time restraint would be, shall we say, undesirable.)

I suppose it was inevitable that as the popularity of the show grows that there would be a spin-off of some type and here is where we get to the idiotic point of this post: Tim Gunn.

Before I ask you the question that is kicking around in my head, let me say that I think he is a lovely man. He seems very kind, he is really nice to the designers and he has a good sense of humor. All in all, there seems to be nothing to dislike and I do like him. So much in fact that I feel a bit twitchy for the rant that is coming but it can't be contained anymore...

He has been labeled a fashion guru. He now has his own show where he helps the fashion inept (ie, people like me) learn how to dress with a little more kick. But here is my question, dear readers: DOES IT BOTHER ANYONE ELSE THAT THE ONLY THING THE FASHION GURU EVER WEARS IS A FREAKIN' SUIT???

Its a suit. A suit! Nothing else!!! I've had it pointed out to me that they are expensive, well tailored suits. But I have a stronger point to counter that argument with: its a freakin' suit!!!

Come on, I know women's fashion has a little bit more flair to it then men's does, but can someone please give this man something else to wear?? He's a fashion expert for cryin' out loud! I had to close up a cut on my hand a couple weeks ago with butterfly stitches. Do you see me running around an ER waving a scalpel screaming "Bring me your injured! I can fix them!"? No! I say if you are an expert, then be more flexible, show us what you can do!!!

Okay, tantrum over. I apologize to Tim (and to you for having to listen to this.) Like I said, he's a nice fellow but for some inexplicable reason, this makes me twitch when I watch the show. If someone can explain this to me, I'd be grateful.

Told you this was a weird post...

Absolute 100% PROOF

I can't tell you how often I avoid watching the news. It seems that the lead stories always revolve around murder, hatred and the human race's exceptional skills at just being destructive to the world. Its enough to make a person want to hole up in their house and not leave.

But I've learned that there are still so many people out there who want to do good, you just don't hear about them that often. So I decided, dear readers, that today I would talk to you about them.

And before I begin to explain who they are and what they do, I want you to understand why I keep talking about this project, why I keep pushing for its success.

I know I’ve talked about Fiberart for a Cause a lot. Its really important to me. My father struggled with and lost his battle with cancer a little over a year ago and now with the holidays here, my mind turns to thoughts of him even more then usual. Enough time has passed that now I can remember some of the good things and its beginning to blot out the bad. I’ll never completely forget how difficult it was, but it wouldn’t be dotted with small patches of light if it weren’t for the people that stood beside me and held my hand - and his - through the whole thing. Its important to say that often they were strangers, people who worked at the hospital or ran patient/family support programs. And all the research that went into the treatments he received were what gave us more time with him.

And I attribute that to all the selfless people who stood up and said, “I’m going to fight this, I’m going to make a difference.” People like Virginia Spiegel and projects like Fiberart for a Cause.

Virginia continues to raise funds through her Art, Nature, Creativity, Life e-book. (By the way, you guys completely rock because the total donations through the e-book are over $3500!) But what strikes me the most is how many people keep stepping up to Virginia’s side to help keep FFAC rolling.

And this, my friends, is absolute 100% proof that the world still keeps churning out good people all of the time.

The latest efforts to raise funds are aided by Iris Karp of Mistyfuse, Karen Stiehl Osborn and Jeanelle McCall.

If, like me, you find Mistyfuse just the coolest stuff on the planet, you will be thrilled to know that you can get your fix AND help support FFAC. 20% of all Mistyfuse purchases between Dec 1 and Dec 31 will be donated to FFAC. Go now, order lots, make art.

The other new FFAC project is Fiberart for a Cause Shop. I rank Virginia, Karen and Jeanelle high on my list of drool-worthy artwork. So what’s really really cool about the Shop is that you can now get a piece of their artwork on a mug, tote bag, t-shirt, mouse pad, and even notecards. There is a $5 profit from each purchase and all of it is going to the American Cancer Society. It may not sound like a lot but keep in mind what every donation can do as well as the fact that once again, nothing is being kept as compensation to the donors – its ALL going to help other people.

I’ve already picked up a mug and a tote bag (because you know that I just have too much stuff and believe me, this is an awesome tote bag because it holds a ton!). There will also be some Christmas gifts coming from the shop.

And if FFAC isn't enough to inspire you, try this one on for size: imagine you're 13 years old and you just found out your friend has cancer. What do you do? Make a card? Bring her flowers? Or how about forming a team for the American Cancer Society's Relay for Life and raising $25,000? That's just what Susan Schrott's daughter, Rose, did. And now Susan is aiding her daughter by offering up some really gorgeous Tree of Life Quilts. (There are only 6 left so go get one while you still can!) Again, here is proof that there are no bounds to just how good people are.

If we keep chipping away at this disease, we could see the end of it in the future. I don't know about you, but that's something I'm willing to fight for for the rest of my life. Virginia and Susan have made it easy for us to do so with Fiberart for a Cause and the Tree of Life quilts.

So please, if you can, go stand with them. I'll meet you there.

Where I Stand Sunday

Being in downtown Detroit stirs memories of my father. He was raised there and worked there for over thirty years for the city's Public Lighting Department. Now that he is gone, I find it calming to stand in the places he walked on for so many years of his life.

Where I Stand Sunday is an ongoing photo essay examining the different places I spend my life standing. Too often we take for granted the everyday places we spend our lives walking on. If you'd like to join me by posting a photo on Sunday of places you've been on your blog/photo hosting site/website, leave a comment on this post telling me where I can find you/your photo and I'll add a link to my sidebar so others can find you

Ethel Strikes Again

She's back. And she's setting herself up for the long haul.

Ethel really wants a handmade Christmas gift. I made her nervous during our last conversation when I mentioned that I'm selling my work now. I detected a twitch. Now she's getting creative in her assaults, this is getting serious.

I have an advantage over Ethel in the way that I can always tell when she is nearby. I sit in cubicles (otherwise known as gray cattle stalls). You learn pretty early on that everyone can hear you speaking, even when on the phone discussing questionable topics. But Ethel has, shall we say, a broken volume switch. You can hear the woman from a mile away and she has no filter either. She will talk about everything from the color of the sky to her unfortunate gynecological ailments (don't worry, I will spare you the details.) And she doesn't care who knows. So in a sense, its kind of like a trumpet sounding when the battle begins, I know when to duck and cover.

On the other hand, Ethel has an even bigger advantage over me -- literally. She is much taller then I am (quit snickering, I know it doesn't take much) and can see me over the cubicle walls. This leaves me at a serious tactical disadvantage. If I can't hear her, I don't know she's there. And this is where she is getting cunning: she has become Stealth Ethel.

Stealth Ethel has the ability to advance on me in silence. I didn't think she had it in her but she is obviously determined to sway me to her way of thinking. She's employing the extra weapon of guilt. She is now seeking a gift, not for herself, but for an unfortunate family member who is at a financial disadvantage. That just happens to have the same taste as her and the same decorations in her kitchen.

Hmmmmmm.....my battle skills tell me she is a dirty liar.

She upped the stakes today. She brought me a coffee and a Mary Englebriet magazine with an example of what her "family member" would like. (I am a devout disciple of coffee. And she even brought it to me black, no cream or sugar, just the way I like it. The woman is pure evil.) She left said magazine with me just in case I "want to look at it for inspiration." If cuteness was the equivalent of diabetes, I would need an extra shot of insulin after looking through this thing.

The way I see it is that dear Ethel does not know yet just how stubborn I can be. In fact, I am so stubborn that I rarely admit that I am. I often opt for adjectives such as "determined" or "firm." But this is war and there is no time for pleasantries. I will embrace the stubbornness as my greatest weapon against Ethel.

So now the question is what to do when she comes back for the magazine. I have a couple of thoughts (if you have other ideas, shout 'em out):

1) Photocopy different pictures and deface the copies with sharpie markers. I'm thinking a devil girl picking flowers with fangs dripping blood may be a good comprimise. We could see if she agrees.

2) Cut out the cutest images and paste them all over my cubicle and myself. When she comes back, giggle hysterically and tell her just how pleased I am to join her way of thinking. She may become frightened and back away. Unfortunately this also may backfired on me and she may welcome me with open arms. Then I'd be screwed.

3) Spill coffee (not the one she brought me, I already drank that) all over the magazine and use it as a note pad for my meetings. Nothing says cute like some schematics of a transmission.

4) Put it in the ladies room for reading material. (Come on say it with me: Eeeeewwwwww....cooties!)

I'm obviously not being clever enough. I need to think on my strategy, its got to be good. I've tried all the obvious ones: saying "no" in a somewhat pissy tone, giving her my you're really annoying me stare (which for those of you who have experienced this know its not to be taken lightly) and even walked away from her during one of her babbling marathons. But she keeps coming back, she is immune, she is strong.

I will figure out a way to defeat her.

The battle is on, Ethel, the battle is on...

Faster then a speeding bullet!

Does this yarn look familiar to you? It should...since I just blogged about it yesterday. Its that big huge mammoth beastie (tamed by Kathleen-the-Yarn-Winding-Goddess) that I picked up at Artisan Knitworks.

I decided to take a size Q crochet hook to it. Armed with my plastic friend, it only took me an hour and a half to make this.

What's that you say? Are you calling me a liar? No really. It only took an hour and a half!

I have a couple crochet stitch books but I just wanted something easy and simple since this yarn is so gigantic and pretty. So I went for a simple bobble scarf and made it up as I went. Here is a close up of the bobble pattern.


They are a little tough to see but they are there and waaaaaaayyyy cool. Not that I am a crochet expert by any means but if you want a simple bobble scarf, here is the pattern I made up for it:

Lynn's Mammoth Bobble Scarf

Yarn: massively chunky

Hook: Size Q

Pattern:

How to make the bobble: begin doing a double crochet but don't finish it, only pull the yarn through the first half of the double crochet. Repeat this so you have three unfinished double crochets worked into the same space, which results in four loops left on the hook. Pull the yarn through the remaining four hooks. Move on to the next stitch.

Chain 13 stitches. (You can do any number of stitches you want, just make sure you have an odd number.)

Rows 1-3: single crochet across the whole row

Row 4: single crochet three stitches, make bobble, single crochet three stitches, make bobble, single crochet the remaining three stitches in the row.

Rows 5-7: single crochet across the whole row

Row 8: single crochet five stitches, make bobble, single crochet remaining five stitches

Repeat Rows 1-8 until you run out of yarn or go blind.


Its not the most thrilling pattern in the world but its simple and it shows off the yarn.

And did I mention that I finished this in an hour and a half? I am completely dumbfounded by this. I never finish anything that quick. This might not impress you but I'm thinking that maybe I should go buy a lottery ticket tomorrow...maybe this is a sign of good things to come.

I love that yarn, I want to go back to Artisan Knitworks and pick out more big mammoth yarn. It snowed for the first time here in Michigan today and its sticking. I need my new scarf. Its waiting by my purse to be used tomorrow morning...

And did I mention I finished it in an hour and a half?

Its not that I don't love you but...

I have a co-worker (who shall remain anonymous but knows who you are) who systematically harasses me every Christmas for handmade gifts. We shall call her Ethel. (This is not a slur so if your name is Ethel, don't send me hate mail. I just have no friends named Ethel so it works out well.)

I think this year I'm done being nice to dear Ethel.

While I would love to tinker away in my studio for hours on end creating loving gifts for all of my family and friends, this is about as likely to happen as Brittney Spears is to stop acting like a whacked out ho.

Sorry to be so blunt but that's the way it is. (I just endured a twenty minute conversation with Ethel about how handmade gifts are better then store bought. I totally agree with her on this but I still want to smack her.)

So for all of you out there who would like a handmade gift from me this year, I bring you the top ten reasons why you won't get one:

1) Last time I checked there were still only 24 hours in a day. If you can figure out how to increase that number to 1,458 hours, then I'll do it.

2) I make weird stuff. I won't tailor it to your likes/dislikes so (if you are like Ethel) and expect me to create just the cutest little country item for you, think again. Although I've never attempted to make skulls in a country theme so that could be amusing.

3) I already own a whole can of crazy. I don't need to add to it by creating Christmas gifts for everyone.

4) I believe in supporting the arts. All of my friends are getting handmade gifts, just not made by me. Doesn't that count for something??

5) Let's be honest, if I make you a moody creepy wall hanging, will you really hang it up on your wall or will it end up as a dog dish placemat? (Everyone can answer except for Leann, I already know her response.) Gifts that end up in drawers will not be repeated.

6) Although it seems like it at times, I do not dabble in every type of art out there. I do not paint, make pottery or draw. I have some friends who would like that. It wouldn't be very nice of me to exclude them, now would it?

7) I did make a friend a gift one year. It was a collage, it was pretty cool, she gushed over it, she raved to everyone. I felt good about it. I visited her about a month later and she had it next to her phone - - she used to jot down messages. I'm still not over it...

8) Did I mention the "there are only 24 hours in a day" thing? I think its a pretty strong point that bears repeating...

9) If you are nagging me to make something for you because you say "I don't have any talent" or "I can't do that", you are fibbing. Everyone has talent, everyone can do something if you really want to. Don't lie, it won't work. I'll just start to look at you sideways.

10) If you've spent the whole time you know me looking at my artwork saying "That could be cute if you did this...", why would you want anything from me??? (Sorry, this one is directed solely at Ethel. She's a grand critic that is desperately trying to help me create cute things. Apparently everything I make can be made cute if I would only follow her directions. She was pretty appalled that I would carve a fat naked woman into a lino block and then make prints. But if I "gave her a dress she would be cute". I swear to god she said that. I congratulate her for stunning me into silence, it takes a lot.)

I love all my family, I love all my friends. But let's face it, there are a gazillion things that go into getting ready for the holidays and in order for me to create artwork as presents, I'd have to start in February. Even then, its unlikely I would finish on time.

So I am giving out gifts this year, they are appropriate to the person they are intended for, they are handmade (just not by me), they are pretty.

And if you are Ethel, please accept the fact that I will NOT make you a cute country wallhanging to put in your kitchen next to your copper rooster. Its not going to happen. There are plenty of very nice talented artists out there who make wonderful work that would fit your tastes. I am beyond saving (translation: I won't make cute) so leave me be or I will give you skulls for Christmas.

P.S. I just want to clarify that I have nothing against cute art or the people that make them. I admire cute, I like it, I often gush over it when I come across it. I just can't make it.

The Holy Trinity of Happiness

Today started out as an ordinary Sunday...I got up, got my coffee, did my weekly Where I Stand Sunday blog post and cuddled the Dooley dog. I wasn't really sure what I wanted to do today and the usual domestic duties of grocery shopping and laundry were making me twitch. Boring, boring, boring.

So I called Leann and asked her if she wanted to go to the Detroit Institute of Arts with me. The DIA has been closed for a long long time for renovation and reopened this past weekend. Apparently everyone in the state of Michigan has decided to attend the reopening and Leann said she would rather take a hot poker to the eye then go when its so crowded. (Okay, so she didn't exactly say that, but that was the sentiment.) Besides, today is Leann's birthday and since she never feels the need to let anyone know about it, I've decided to publicly out her on my blog so the world will know that TODAY IS LEANN'S BIRTHDAY!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY LEANN!!! I HOPE YOU HAD A WONDERFUL BIRTHDAY LEANN!!!!

So Leann decided she wanted to go do something fun with her husband SINCE ITS LEANN'S BIRTHDAY TODAY (HAPPY BIRTHDAY LEANN!!!) and since I still wasn't thrilled about doing laundry and grocery shopping (can't think of anyone who is), I decided to go haunt the bookstore. That's when Mary, hereafter known as Mary The Human Compass, called to say she got off work early and did I want to go do something. This is where today got fun.

When I attended the fiber expo/gun show (I only went to the fiber expo, honest) last month, I met a very nice man who is one of the owners of Artisan Knitworks in Grosse Pointe. I have been wanting to check the place out since then but alas, I am severely directionally challenged and didn't dare venture out there on my own. But with Mary The Human Compass's assistance, today turned out to be the perfect day!

And please note that today is Sunday. Any yarn store that is open on Sunday has already won major bonus points in my book. (Hint to all the other fabric and yarn stores out there: people who work during the week like to spend money on the weekends. I know, I know, its a well kept secret but we have money from working full time and if you are open when we can actually come and see you, we'll probably give you some of it.)

I gotta tell you, I'm moving into this yarn store. They don't know it yet but if you were there today too, you would be making the same plans. It is the prettiest yarn store I have ever been in in my life.

When you first walk in you are greeted by the boutique section of the store.


Everything is hand knit. There are sweaters, scarves, gloves, socks, hats, wraps, purses. Some are felted, some are knitted on teeny needles, some are made for going out on the town, some are cozy looking and some of it is crocheted. Yup, you got it people, a yarn store that is not snooty when it comes to crochet. They also get major points in my book for that one as well.

And once you get over the beauty of what yarn can be turned into you, you are greeted by the other half of the store where you find all this.




Mary The Human Compass and I just kind of stood there and stared - in silence. And if you know us, you know it must have been stunning because we never shut up.

All the yarn this place sells is handspun, hand dyed or both. And you can really tell. There is an energy and warmth to it that you just don't find in commercial yarn. (And I'm not knocking commercial yarn so don't give me that look.) Combine all this fibery goodness with the absolutely wonderful people that work there and let me tell you, its irresistable.

I bought this yarn (did you really think I would make it out of there without something? Yeah, right.)


Its super bulky and is going to make a wonderful warm squishy scarf. It should knit up really quick and the colors are way better in person. I have to thank Kathleen-the-Yarn-Winding- Goddess, that works at Artisan Knitworks for wrestling it into this neat little ball. Well, I really shouldn't use the adjective little because its anything but. Here's a picture of another ball of yarn next to it for scale.


The yarn on the left has 174 yards and the yarn on the right has 130. Its a mammoth beastie.

Kathleen-the-Yarn-Winding-Goddess had to break out the gigantic ball winder when winding it. The skein was kind of tangled and not really interested in cooperating. She was quite the determined person when it came to taming it and I thank her for that. I think that if I had attempted to do this at home (I have no ball winder), I would have been swearing. But not Kathleen, she was calm and cool and collected and thanks to her, I plan to start knitting with this tonight.

Mary picked up a really pretty skein of lighter weight yarn in a natural brown color that I was drooling over (well, I drooled over everything in there) and called me to tell me how great it is. She's crocheting it on a larger hook to give it an open lacy look. Kathleen-the-Yarn-Winding-Goddess also took care of Mary's yarn while we were there. You totally have to meet this chick, she's awesome.

We left there with a warm fuzzy feeling - and not just because we bought wool. We got to speak with the owner, Sandra, about classes. The woman even had me thinking that learning to knit a sweater was a good idea. I'm not sure how that happened, but its a testament to their knitting magical powers there. They are just too cool.

If you have a chance to visit them, you totally should. Nice people, seriously drool-worthy yarns and just the prettiest yarn store I've ever stepped foot in.

After we left there, Mary and I realized we were close to Greektown. So we went down there. We picked up some yummies at the Astoria bakery (where I picked up a killer fudge brownie cookie that I plan to devour after I'm done with this post) and made a super quick trip into the casino. (I spent $7 on the Wheel of Fortune slot machine. I am a completely unskilled gambler and rarely spend more then a couple bucks.)

It was a really nice day. So what's the Holy Trinity of Happiness you ask? Yarn, chocolate and friends.

Life doesn't get any sweeter then this....

Where I Stand Sunday

The leaves had turned color some time ago but the trees were unwilling to let them go. Their contrast against the sky was stunning but with the temperature dropping near freezing in the evenings, they all came down with one shudder. The ground is covered in a riot of all imaginable colors as winter wins another battle.

Where I Stand Sunday is an ongoing photo essay examining the different places I spend my life standing. Too often we take for granted the everyday places we spend our lives walking on. If you'd like to join me by posting a photo on Sunday of places you've been on your blog/photo hosting site/website, leave a comment on this post telling me where I can find you/your photo and I'll add a link to my sidebar so others can find you.

Linocut madness!

I just ate Thanksgiving dinner for the third time tonight. Yes, you read that right, the third time (my family still has not learned to cook for less then a thousand people when it comes to the holidays). Granted, these are leftovers so they are no where near the fanfare of the actual Thanksgiving feast, but I'm gettin' sick of the turkey. At any rate, I hope you all had a good one this year!

Yesterday evening I carved three more linoleum blocks. My mother took Leann's place in the cringing you-better-not-chop-off-a-finger department. I'm happy to report that I still have ten fingers and no gouges so we are good. I carved a luna moth, a bird sitting on a branch and The Hanged Man from tarot cards (which is for a chunky book trade due in January for the ATC Exchange).

Today I spent the day printing them. And what an adventure it turned out to be. And no, it wasn't all grand. I did some surfing last night looking for advice on how to go about getting good prints.

Here was my brilliant plan to lino print grandness:

1.) put the paper on top of the inked block and rub like hell (I did this at Leann's house and it worked real well for the ginko leaf block)

2.) put the paper on the floor, the block on top and then stand on it. (I will not tell you how many pounds I am but it is many and I figure that would put a lot of pressure on it)

3.) I would also try printing with acryllic paint because I wanted to do work on fabric.

I was pumped, I was ready, I woke up all excited to be spending the day making art. I came downstairs, had my morning coffee, cuddled the Dooley dog and went to work.

Let's just say that after two hours of various attempts (putting too much ink on the block, not enough, different papers, my ingenious ideas on getting even pressure), I will only show you these two prints.



Why only these two you ask? Because....the rest of them sucked.

Even when the paper prints were not working out as well as I would have liked, I was still optimistic about the fabric prints. I had the hairbrained idea that acrylic paint would be better then ink. So I loaded up the block with the paint and put the fabric on top of the block and rubbed it.

I got this.

And before you start saying "That's not so bad", let me assure you, it is. Its not crisp and kind of smeary looking. Oh, and acrylic paint doesn't wash off lino blocks so easily...ask me how I know. I need at least 25 fabric prints for the fabric postcard exchange I'm in and this clearly wasn't going to work.

I was having serious issues getting even pressure for the print. (If you click on the pictures above they will get bigger and you can see all the gaps in the printing in really glaring detail.) I sat and stared at the floor littered with all these not-so-grand sucky prints and started thinking unlady-like thoughts about the whole thing. I also examined my metal trash can and contemplated using it to burn them all.

Needless to say I was frustrated. I had gone through quite a bit of ink and paper and hadn't found my groove. And I knew how to remedy it but had woken up this morning determined to find an alternative.

For those of you who don't know me, when I become interested in something new I will research it to death. During my internet travels about linocuts I came across this mini press. By the time I started thinking about it again today, I had pretty much come close to running out of ink which meant I was going to have to visit the art store to get more. And I wanted to print on fabric and was becoming generally pissy about the whole thing. It became personal, I was going to make this work. I called Utrecht's, they had the press and would hold it for me and since I have one of their cards, I had a coupon for an extra 20% off.

So one 60 mile round trip later, I was back in my studio with this set up. (That's the press there on the right. I realize the black trash bag covering the work table, black printing ink and black press make for a brilliantly interesting photo but work with me here, I was on a mission and had no time for such concerns as color contrast in photos.)


And I made this.



So then I made these.



Are they all perfect? Of course not, but they are all way better then what I was getting before and I consider all of them usable.

The mini press is pretty nifty. Here's a better picture of it.


Its really little and has a padded lower surface that the upper metal surface pushes against. This seemed to really work well for the fabric prints. I did discover pretty quickly that to do the prints on fabric you have to much heavier handed with the ink. But that was okay because I was getting consistently good prints and not wanting to chuck the blocks out the window.

I want to do some prints on paper, I have some ideas on ways to display them. But I really wanted to get a move on with those postcards. Tomorrow I will heat set the ink with an iron, cut out the timtex and start assembling them. I'm going to keep the stitching simple since I don't want to take away from the design but there is still a long way to go on them.

This evening I'm going to chill on the sofa with the Dooley dog and start crocheting a scarf out of this yarn and this pattern.

This is from Vogue's latest Stitchionary series. I have a love/hate relationship with crochet. On the one hand, I love the patterns like the one above, I think they are quite pretty. On the other hand, some of the tackiest items in crafting history have been produced by crochet. I guess it all depends on the evil intentions of the creator. Don't worry, this yarn is too pretty to make anything tacky with, I'll be nice to it.

Getting on the wagon...

I belong to three art groups: Running with Scissors (a fiber art group), The ATC Exchange (a paper art group) and Looking Glass Dolls (well, I think that one is self-explanatory...its about dolls.) They all meet in Livonia, Michigan at Scrappy Chic so if you are in the area or want to drive hundreds of miles one way to hang out, stop by and join us.

The ATC Exchange trades ATCs each month (just call me Captain Obvious) and our theme for December is "Resolutions." And its been kicking around in my head ever since the last meeting.

I'm not really much of a resolution girl. You know, there's the usual stuff: eat healthy, loose weight, don't be such a clutter freak. Other then that, I don't really plan too much. Maybe its because I know I'll burn out on it and then just kick myself in the can for not sticking to it.

But what really got me thinking was about what I want to do with my art in 2008. 2007 was a pretty kick ass year...and also insanely busy. I was juried into several shows, was published in Quilting Arts Magazine, was published in 1,000 Artist Trading Cards (and had work accepted for 1,000 Artist Journal Pages), curated a gallery show, curated
Breaking Traditions and seemed to make lots of art. Seemed being the keyword in that sentence.

But wait, did I really make all that much art? I was looking through my photos last night (which was an interesting experience in a trippy sort of way. I went to the eye doctor yesterday afternoon and he dilated my eyes, I looked like something from a sci-fi movie. Hello, I am amphibian frog lady...riiiiibbbbiiiiittttt. Looking at a computer kind of hurt but I was bored so I tortured myself anyway. Oh, and you know how they say your eyes will be back to normal in two to three hours? They are dirty liars. Mine lasted nine hours.) I was thinking that I really need to set some time aside to update my website. Which, in all honesty, I won't need to schedule a big block of time for.

I didn't get nearly as much artwork done last year as I thought. Its depressing in a Sylvia Plath sort of way. It seems that most of the work I made was in response to a show or a deadline. Ick. Bad, Lynn, bad.

I was pretty much a show whore last year. My resolution for next year is to not do that. Although the temptation is strong, I will do my best to be true to my art and make art for art's sake. (And when I get home today I will promptly burn the prospectus I printed off at lunch time today.)

Why do you think we do this? I know I'm not the only one... it really doesn't make sense. Granted, sometimes I need the kick in the butt to get moving and I guess I tend to view show deadlines as one of them but the real truth is that it sucks all the joy out of the process and turns me into a mumbling crazy person who spends her lunch break at work calculating how many minutes she has left to finish something.

Then I realized with horror that my work could probably be far better then what it really is. Remove the time contraints, remove show expectations, remove size restricitions, remove themes...and just work.

My resolution for 2008 is going to be to create art with the intent of pursuing solo exhibits in 2009. Which makes me twitch (see #33 and #81 from my 100 things list). Which should mean that I will have much more interesting things to feed the blog with. And I can get kinda weird when I'm working through a project so at least it will be entertaining for you.

I'm counting on all of you out there to keep me in line. Give me a good whack across the back of the head if you see posts about being accepted into shows, that means I've fallen off the wagon. Now, there are two exceptions to this in which if you smack me I'll hit ya back: the
Michigan Quilt Artist Invitational and exhibits for the American Sewing Expo. Those are special to me and I enjoy them so there is no joyless-soul-sucking expectations involved in those.

Other then that, you have permission to smack me down when I start to get that urge to make art for the sake of entering an exhibit. (I'm sure I've totally made Leann's day with this.)

On another note...I went back to the univeristy art supply store today at lunch and picked up four more lino blocks to carve. I feel a little bit like I'm cheating on my love (refering to fiber being my primary medium). I keep saying things like, "Oh, these will make great prints on fabric!", while in the back of my mind I have visions of bizarre paper collages featuring these blocks. I feel a little smutty for thinking such things. But I guess its a good thing to get dirty every once in a while...

I'm in love!

(Quickie note: I should clarify that I am in love with carving these blocks, not the naked little woman in the photo.)

Leann had a small art gathering at her house this afternoon. She had sugar skulls all set up to decorate and tons of food. Julia, Joan and Rose were also there and we were huddled around her dining room table working and eating (and drinking the chocolate ice cream/liquor shots that Leann created for us. Good woman.)

I decided to try out linocuts. Leann has done them before and is also a master carver of rubber stamps so I figured if I ran into problems, it would be nice to be able to ask someone. Of course, she was quite adamant in letting me know that since I refused to take the proper precautions in carving that she would not take me to the hospital when I chopped off a finger. Her husband, the loving and incredibly kind Mark, said he would so I decided not to be concerned. (Of course, Mark was concerned about stains on the hard wood floor so maybe his reasons were not quite that heroic but still, I'll take what I can get.)

I wanted to carve two blocks: one of a ginko leaf and one of the Venus of Willendorf. (As a side story, I had an interesting experience looking for an image of her the other day. I always refer to her as "that fat little booby goddess." I'm sure you'll be shocked to know that putting that phrase into google got me nothing. I even emailed Leann and said "Hey Leann, what's the name of the fat little booby goddess?" She didn't know either, even though she knew exactly who I was referring too. But I found her and now I know her proper name so there you have it.)

I am really thrilled with how they turned out!!! Here they are:


Here she is, the fat booby goddess. The print on the right is on fabric. I'm going to play around with printing with more ink on the block and also trying to print with acrylic paint. The ink I used today is Speedball's water soluble printing ink.



Here's the ginko leaf block. The print on the left is on paper with lots of ink (that one took a little while to dry) and the one on the right is on fabric. I think the image came out real nice.

I'm planning on using these two images to make prints on fabric for a fabric postcard exchange that I am in. I'm really pretty giddy at the possibilities these blocks have to offer.

And here is a wonderful shot of Leann being the hostess with the mostest:


She was extremely proud of this bread and I can't say that I blame her, it rocked! (I say "rocked" instead of "rocks" because we ate him. He is no more.) When we went on the
Dia de los Muertos walk, we saw several loaves of breads on altars that were skeleton shaped. She went online, found a recipe and made this guy. He poofed a lot so his ribs melded together (she kept calling him the Micheiln Man) but I think he still looked awesome! And he tasted great too!

It was a grand day. I made art, I tried something new and I'm excited to attack those postcards I'm running behind on.

Oh, and when I got home, this was in the living room:


Don't twitch too much. I'm hosting a holiday party here for the art groups I belong to on Dec 7 so it needed to go up earlier then usual. Yes, I know it could have waited until next weekend but my mom is the tree decorator and she was geared up to do it so she went to town on it. Looks pretty, huh?

Okay, I'm wandering off to surf the net and obsessively read about linocuts...

Where I Stand Sunday

When I leave for work in the mornings I am greeted by crunchy frosty grass. By early afternoon its melted off. The battle between autumn and winter is in full swing. It won't be long before the ground is completely white with ice and snow.

Where I Stand Sunday is an ongoing photo essay examining the different places I spend my life standing. Too often we take for granted the everyday places we spend our lives walking on. If you'd like to join me by posting a photo on Sunday of places you've been on your blog/photo hosting site/website, leave a comment on this post telling me where I can find you/your photo and I'll add a link to my sidebar so others can find you.